Sucker Punch'd

This post should probably wait until morning, but I can't sleep and I'm pretty much writing it in my head as I lie awake in bed (which I seem to have a habit of doing), so I might as well do it now.

I keep saying this isn't a movie review blog, and yet this is the third such post in a row. Ah well, so is life. There'll be a more personal, relevant post coming at some point, along the lines of "so hey, I finally moved to California like I said I was going to..."


Anyway, Sucker Punch. The reason for this post.

I went into Sucker Punch with certain expectations. It's Zack Snyder, which means hardcore action and beautiful, if almost entirely digital, visuals. It's also Snyder's first movie that isn't a remake or adaptation, so I knew not to expect anything truly impressive story wise.

The result? Snyder met all of my expectations. The action sequences were stunning, featuring his trademark slow-motion long takes and his skillful use of color palettes. The acting wasn't great-- it's clear the actresses were chosen for looks over ability (Emily Browning was enchanting to look at, but ruined it every time she opened her mouth). That said, Carla Gugino, Jena Malone, and Oscar Isaac did fantastic jobs. Jon Hamm was good too, but he was in so little of the movie I don't dare count him.

I could go into more detail about the movie's failings at a coherent, understandable storyline, but I will spare you the spoilers because, if you like Snyder's aesthetic, you should see this movie. It's enjoyable and worth the price of the popcorn.


As I watched this movie, I realized something about Zack Snyder. Sucker Punch, like Watchmen before it, had an amazing soundtrack full of haunting covers of already classic songs (some of which, I just discovered, were actually performed by the cast, so, well done on your versions of 'Sweet Dreams Are Made of These' and 'Where Is My Mind,' Emily Browning. You have redeemed yourself.).

But think about this: Intense, picturesque, beautifully composed shots + action sequences which (thankfully) require little dialogue + quick, concise storytelling + music? Add those together and you get a pretty good music video!

Music videos, like other forms of short film, need to tell an entire story in a very short amount of time. This requires a condensed plot, increased stakes, and a reliance on visuals over dialogue to tell the story. You don't have time for a lengthy story progression or any in depth character growth. You need to say what you need to say without pulling any punches (pun slightly intended). I was not surprised to learn that Snyder has actually directed some music videos and commercials (often another example of short-form cinematic storytelling).

And, in the end, that's what Sucker Punch was: a series of really great music videos interspersed like commercial breaks or musical interludes throughout an otherwise raw and thought-provoking short film about lecherous men taking advantage of beautiful but otherwise empty and broken, weak-and-yet-strong women. That or it's making a statement on the horrifying treatment of the mentally ill. Not unpleasant, but not a cohesive feature-length film.


Now, you know me, I'm a stickler and a nit picker, so I couldn't finish this post without harping on about a few details. Feel free to ignore this next section.

Point 1: The movie takes place (at least in part) at "Lenox House for the Mentally Unstable" in Brattleboro, Vermont. Fun fact: there actually is a psychiatric hospital in Brattleboro. I realize that the movie is meant as fantasy, so they naturally portray Lenox House as harsh and seedy, entirely unlike the actual Brattleboro Retreat, which is one of the oldest, most progressive and patient-friendly psychiatric hospitals in the country. I'm not going to complain about that. I just thought it was interesting to point out.
If you want a movie about life in the loony bin, watch It's Kind of a Funny Story.

Point 2: Babydoll (Emily Browning)'s dancing is a major plot point in the movie, but all we see of her dancing is a few awkward shifts from foot to foot and maybe a little hip movement. Yes, the point is that her dancing is her escape into the fantasy world of her mind, but the fact of the matter is, back in the "real" world, her dance is apparently so wonderful that all men who see it are instantly hypnotized or some bullshit like that. If you want us to believe that, want us to suspend our disbelief on that point, you should have at least given us a little glimpse.

Point 3: The movie ends with a character (I won't say who) boarding a bus destined for Fort Wayne and leaving Brattleboro. The bus driver lies to some state troopers to cover the fact that she doesn't have a ticket by saying she's been on the bus since Hartford. Any bus route that would take you from Hartford, Connecticut, to Brattleboro, Vermont, then on to Fort Wayne, Indiana is a really fucked up route.

Point 3.5: As the bus drives off into the sunset (of course), we see a landscape of rolling hills covered in wheat. A very midwestern view, and one I would expect on a bus trip to Indiana, but NOT anywhere CLOSE to Vermont. I've driven through Vermont enough times to know that there are no rolling hills, and any amber waves of grain are few and far between. It's a stupid point to get bothered by, but it just feels to me like Snyder forgot where he set the movie in the first place, and somehow between the beginning and the end, Lenox House went from the oldest city in Vermont to rural Ohio.


Aaaaaaaaanyway, I digress. Sucker Punch was an enjoyable film. Wait, revise that. Sucker Punch was an enjoyable collection of music videos, trying to tell an Inception-esque, escapist story of a fantasy world within another fantasy world. Still, like I said, if you liked Snyder's other movies, you'll probably like Sucker Punch at least a little bit.

All I can say is that his Superman reboot will most likely be better, and he should probably stick to what he's good at and let somebody else handle the writing from now on.

The Green Hornet Review*

* The title of this blog post can be read as either "The Green Hornet-Review" or "The Green-Hornet Review", though only one of those readings makes any sense. Choose whichever one you prefer.

A Disclaimer
Let me start by saying I dislike movie review blogs. I tend not to read them, unless they are humorous and/or recommended to me by a trusted friend. My last entry could seem like a review of RED, but I'd prefer to think of it as a statement on "arte film" v. mainstream blockbusters and the qualities they each possess.

That said, I just saw The Green Hornet and, rather than immediately posting my thoughts on Twitter like I do for most movies, I decided to write a blog post.

So there you are.


The Actual Thing
To begin: some context. I firmly believe that the environment in which you see a movie has a lot to do with your experience of it.

I had a long day today. I work at Gap, upstairs in the Kids/Baby/Maternity department(s), and as usual, I was the only person up there. I had lines of people at my register, bratty kids to deal with, and carts stacked high with new merchandise I was somehow suppose to find a place for. As usual, the people working downstairs pretty much forgot I was there and didn't send me on my fifteen minute break until near the end of my shift.

I've been looking forward to Green Hornet's release all week. I've followed this movie since Stephen Chow was attached to direct/play Kato (we're talking 2008, when I first figured how who Stephen Chow is and how awesome he can be). It fell out of my mind for a while, but returned when it was announced that Chow had left the project and Michel Gondry had signed on to be the new director (2009). As I mentioned in a previous post, Gondry is one of my favorite directors, if not my outright favorite. So, in reality, you could say I've been looking forward to this movie's release for about a year, maybe more. It's been on the list of "movies I'm definitely going to see when they come out" since I first heard about it. After a shitty day like today, it was exactly what I needed.

I asked if anyone else in the house wanted to go (even though I usually go to the movies alone to get some kind of catharsis [or maybe because I have no friends]) because it seemed like the thing to do. My stepbrother and I then headed to the mall and paid the $13 for our spiffy 3D specs. I got a free small popcorn and a $4.75 soda, and our movie experience began.


The Actual Actual Thing (I really mean it this time)
The Green Hornet was... okay. It was fun. It wasn't a superhero movie, and it didn't really try to be. At times it was a bit overdone and began to lull, but overall I think it succeeded.

Seth Rogen's writing was great. His acting... not as great, but he did a decent job. He played the same character he always plays— himself— but threw in some punches. (Haha! punches! I'm hilarious!)
Relative unknown Jay Chou did a fantastic job as Kato. The trailer showed nothing of his personality, which was unfortunate for a trailer. It's hard for me to imagine Stephen Chow in the role after seeing Chou. Kato is a huge part, and whoever attempted it had big shoes to fill, but just as nobody had heard of Bruce Lee before the Green Hornet TV series, I'd never heard of Jay Chou before now, and was definitely pleasantly surprised. He was funny, talented, and believable. Well done, Chou.
Cameron Diaz was... I'm sorry, just thinking her name makes me want to throw up. I don't like Cameron Diaz. I find her vapid and unfunny, and not really that attractive. She wasn't terrible in this movie, but I think that was due more to how her character was written than how she played it. Rogen used cliché well. The female character drove the two male characters (and rivals in love) apart, eventually spurring the third act conflict that brings them back together stronger than ever before, but he avoided any actual romantic subplot, so way to go Rogen. And... I guess Diaz helped too. A little. Maybe.
By far the stand out performance came from Christoph Waltz as crime czar Chudnofsky. Waltz stole the show in Inglourious Basterds, and he did it again here. You got a sense of his swagger in the trailer, but just like Chou, his true character didn't come through until the final product. Luckily his entrance is one of the very first scenes, featuring a very pleasant cameo by James Franco, and introduces the character in an amazing way. He starts off quiet, understated, maybe even a little shy and insecure, but soon he becomes powerful, dangerous, and still insecure but in a fabulously evil way. Enough can't really be said about Waltz's Chudnofsky, so I won't say any more, and move on to...

Gondry. Yesssssssss, Gondry.

Green Hornet was a pretty big departure for Gondry, his first feature length film since Eternal Sunshine that he didn't write and direct. Maybe that was a good thing, because his two films after Sunshine and Human Nature (both written by Charlie Kaufman) felt a lot like Charlie Kaufman films, and while that aesthetic worked for Gondry, it's nice to see him work with someone else's material. That's part of what makes his music videos so great— shaping the look and feel to the story of the song, or at least the tone, rhythm, or intent of the song.

Green Hornet was also a lot shinier and a lot less "homespun" than Gondry's previous work, and yet it never lost his particular whimsy. There was a comically fast-motion sequence which served to both highlight Britt's party lifestyle and introduce the vast collection of cars which would later become part of the plot. During the first fight scene, when Kato sprang to action in super-kick-ass-mode, there was the "extend-o-vision" effect seen in the trailer (2:05).

By far, the most "Gondry" sequence comes when Chudnofsky tells his henchmen to spread word throughout the city that he wants the Green Hornet dead. In what seems like one take, a henchman speaks to two women, they nod, pick up knives, and walk their separate ways, going into splitscreen. They each talk to someone else, who talks to someone else, every time splitting the screen again until you have eight shots of people preparing to kill the Green Hornet, all in what looks like one take, before cutting to (full screen) scenes of actual violence taking place. It's very much like his video for Cibo Matto's Sugar Water, and I watched the whole thing with a giddy grin.

I took some issue with the plot, because even though Britt/Kato set out to do good and save people, they don't do much of anything. Sure, they shut down a bunch of meth labs and get all up in the face of the gangs, but no real benefit is shown, and they're portrayed as villains by the media, which is supposed to be a cover, but ends up being sort of the truth. The "big payoff" never really happened, but it didn't-happen in a way that was a little funny and off-beat and suited the style, if not my expectations.

Character growth happened startlingly late, which frustrated me a lot because it meant that the main character was a dick for the majority of the film. I guess he was supposed to be a lovable, humorous dick, but a dick is a dick and I had little sympathy for him. It was only made up for by the fact that Kato's character was awesome throughout.

The End Result

The Green Hornet was good. You should see it. Don't spend extra for 3D.

<3- Gaz